There were FIFTY of them! And they were all HAWT!!
Oh wait wait wait everybody, it turns out everything’s ok after all. This one judge in Ohio had lots of awesome sex with 50 very attractive females (his words) so there’s nothing to worry about. Whew!
Now that the dogs of war are calling for the head of Senator Al Franken I believe it is time to speak up on behalf of all heterosexual males. As a candidate for Governor let me save my opponents some research time. In the last fifty years I was sexually intimate with approximately 50 very attractive females. It ranged from a gorgeous blonde who was my first true love and we made passionate love in the hayloft of her parents [sic] barn and ended with a drop dead gorgeous red head from Cleveland.
Now can we get back to discussing legalizing marijuana and opening the state hospital network to combat the opioid crisis. I am sooooo disappointed by this national feeding frenzy about sexual indiscretions decades ago.
Peace.
What a relief, right? Imagine if they hadn’t all been very attractive? Imagine if there had been only forty of them, or [shudder] thirty?
Yeah but for real – dude missed the point, didn’t he. The issue isn’t having sex. The issue certainly isn’t how attractive Male Candidate X’s sex partners were or were not. The issue is harassment and assault and rape. I think the distinction is pretty obvious. You’d hope it was one that judges were well aware of.
Why, oh why, oh why do people have to conflate issues of non-consensual sexual behavior with issues of having consensual out-of-wedlock sex? Everyone seems to think that telling guys you can’t grab women who don’t want to be grabbed (or who are asleep or drunk or in a coma because they just had a major car wreck or their blood sugar dropped) is the same as saying “no man can have sex anymore ever again anywhere at any time”.
This specimen seems to struggle to control his urge to be in control of others. Running for Governor! How many people is he going to drug or subdue to get where he wants?
Also not much in the clever department. But his dog loves him.
Yup, cruising for teenagers at the mall, coercing women who are your professional subordinates to watch while you wank, crashing dressing-rooms to perv at pageant contestants, pouring freshman so full of alcohol they cannot stand, entrapping co-workers in hotel rooms….
Just normal heterosexuality by his standards. Problem is, our culture is so devoted to rewarding sociopathic behavior that his mistake is understandable, if unforgivable.
In 61 years, I’ve been with three women, all of whom wanted me. I think my ‘score’ is better than his.