What to call it
There’s a thing called Jo’s cervical cancer trust, which tells us it’s the UK’s leading cervical cancer charity. Glinner mentioned it yesterday.
It has a page headed Language to use when supporting trans men and/or non-binary people. It explains why this matters.
Using the correct language when referring to someone’s gender identity is a simple and effective way to demonstrate support and recognition. If incorrect language is used without being corrected, it can cause someone to feel hurt or distressed. This may lead them to leave and to eventually seek support elsewhere.
That’s rather anxiety-producing, if you ask me, because what is correct or incorrect language is constantly shifting and is also different depending on which expert is telling you what the correct language is.
Remember, everyone makes mistakes from time to time. It’s important that you acknowledge them, correct yourself, learn from them, and move on. Dwelling on mistakes could make the person you are talking to feel more uncomfortable.
Oh dear, more anxiety. I’ll probably get it wrong, and then when I do get it wrong I’ll probably deal with it the wrong way.
This glossary explains some of the words we use in our information or that you might hear used by a patient. This is not a definitive list and we recognise that some people may prefer different words. It is still necessary to check the words or phrases your patient would prefer.
Oh god oh god oh god. I’m too anxious to get out the door now, let alone using language to support trans men.
Anyway…first item in the glossary…
Bonus hole – An alternative word for the vagina. It is important to check which words someone would prefer to use.
Go jump off a very high bridge.
Oh gawd.
Oh gawdesss.
Please, no.
BONUS HOLE??
Doesn’t that privilege the other one, the ASSHOLE?
Should that be called the PRIMARY HOLE?
Yes, it does, as many are pointing out, with some asperity.
The other one is not actually a hole, but the end of a very long and winding tube. High school level biology, really.
I would think that learning that one has cervical cancer would “cause someone to feel hurt or distressed.” But I lack a bonus hole, so what do I know.
Some people’s “bonus hole” is where part of their brains should be.
I concur that this is absurd, and “bonus hole” may be the worst of the nonsense language yet, but at the same time, a doctor dealing with a patient does need to be able to keep them comfortable. I think the better approach, though, would be for the guidelines to say, “Use the proper terminology unless a patient makes a specific request otherwise, then make a note in the file and do the best you can to adapt.” Still showing compassion for the patient, but not putting the onus on the doctor to have a twenty-minute convo about terminology before they can even get to work.
I don’t think so. I think doctors should go right on using the proper medical terminology.
Bonus hole? Is that for patients identifying as pinball machines?
It’s not that much worse than “front hole’.
And doncha love how the concern for anxiety and courtesy is always entirely one sided? Assuming that hearing the “wrong” terminology can cause anxiety, why not also assume that there is anxiety regarding “making a mistake” and using the right terminology. Surely that anxiety is just as “valid”. Surely that anxiety is more widespread, just by virtue of population sizes. Surely the onus of courtesy is thus on the smaller, newcomer population to adapt to the existing idiom, if only as a matter of brute numerical weight in the consequentialist calculus.
You can’t have it both ways. You can’t say that we ought not do something because causing anxiety is bad while doing something that causes more anxiety.
My point exactly.
J.A., I’m not sure which hole you are referring to as the other one, but in reality, all the holes are the ends of long tubes…unless you talk about the mouth or nostrils, which are the beginning of a large tube.
It’s just SO WEIRD. Nobody felt “hurt or distressed” by the use of accurate words for body parts until fifteen minutes ago, but now it’s such a problem everybody has to inform health care workers and rewrite their pamphlets and lecture everyone on what to say and how to apologise if we get it wrong.
And seemingly intelligent people go along with it all as if everything’s normal.
What about the anxiety of patients about to be screened or waiting fearfully for their results? Wouldn’t that be increased a lot if you start a discussion about what terms they would prefer for parts of their anatomy instead of getting on with actual medical part? As a cancer survivor I can tell you that each second you have to wait for results is spent in a very special anxiety hell, only good manners would have stopped me from screaming if doctors had asked me what I would like my testicles to be called..
BTW, I strongly suspect that it is not trans men who actually advocate for this but trans women and TRAs.
This is where Intersectional Oppression Calculus steps in to maximize the “anxiety” suffered by trans people (double bonus points for TiMs), and minimizes or eliminates the anxiety of the rest of the population (minus quadruple demerit points for “white” women). It’s like the arcane mathematics of income tax returns and the disparity of impact on your bottom line between a contribution to a political part vs. a charitable donation.
We’re rapidly approaching the point at where the only acceptable ‘medical’ practice will be dangling a pretty crystal over the p̶a̶t̶i̶e̶n̶t̶ c̶l̶i̶e̶n̶t̶ companion in your wellness journey while chanting soothing nonsense syllables.
I fear that this is a feature not a bug.