I/me
Colin Wright on the “pronouns” question:
‘What are your pronouns?” is a seemingly innocuous question that has become increasingly common. Pronouns are now frequently displayed prominently in social-media bios, email signatures and conference name tags.
…
The Human Rights Campaign, which claims to be the “nation’s largest LGBTQ+ civil rights organization,” recently tweeted that we should all begin conversations with “Hi, my pronouns are _____. What are yours?” We are told that asking for, sharing and respecting pronouns is “inclusive” to trans and nonbinary people, and that failing to do so may even constitute violence and oppression.
Even if you accept that claim (which I don’t), what about everyone else? What about being inclusive to people who understand what pronouns are and thus find it absurd to talk about your my our her his pronouns? What about people who want to be intelligible? What about people who are allergic to bullshit?
While being subjected to constant rituals of pronoun exchanges may seem silly or annoying at best and exhausting at worst, in reality participating in this ostensibly benign practice helps to normalize a regressive ideology that is inflicting enormous harm on society.
That too. That’s the most important reason for not complying, but there are also aesthetic, epistemic, moral, and other kinds of reasons. There are a lot of reasons not to and no good reasons pointing the other way.
Gender activists believe that being a man or a woman requires embracing stereotypes of masculinity or femininity, respectively, or the different social roles and expectations society imposes on people because of their sex. Planned Parenthood explicitly states that gender identity is “how you feel inside,” defines “gender” as a “a social and legal status, a set of expectations from society, about behaviors, characteristics, and thoughts,” and asserts that “it’s more about how you’re expected to act, because of your sex.”
…
The clear message of gender ideology is that, if you’re a female who doesn’t “identify with” the social roles and stereotypes of femininity, then you’re not a woman; if you’re a male who similarly rejects the social roles and stereotypes of masculinity, then you’re not a man. Instead, you’re considered either transgender or nonbinary, and Planned Parenthood assures you that “there are medical treatments you can use to help your body better reflect who you are.” According to this line of thinking, certain personalities, behaviors and preferences are incompatible with certain types of anatomy.
So Planned Parenthood is actually encouraging people to mutilate themselves and/or mess with their hormones. It’s shockingly reckless and destructive.
So when someone asks for your pronouns, and you respond with “she/her,” even though you may be communicating the simple fact that you’re female, a gender ideologue would interpret this as an admission that you embrace femininity and the social roles and expectations associated with being female.
Are there separate pronouns for feminists? No, of course not, so we’re stuck with this “I’m a woman and that means I embrace all the stupid rules imposed on female people” – and bang goes centuries of work trying to get rid of those stupid rules.
Coercing people into publicly stating their pronouns in the name of “inclusion” is a Trojan horse that empowers gender ideology and expands its reach.
Along with being embarrassing and pathetic. I’ve never been asked, but if I ever am, I don’t imagine it will go smoothly.
My pronouns are I/me. Teehee.
What you use behind my back is none of my f business.
Thank Shiva I am now retired. This nonsense had not been mandated yet at my local government employer, but the State of California is beginning to spread that infection.
But why limit it to pronouns?
‘Hi there. I’m allergic to bullshit. What are your allergies?’
Just spotted on Twitter:
Overheard on campus:
Lecturer: hey, your beard’s coming along nicely.
Student: actually, I’m trying to identify as gender neutral and that comment is really triggering.
Lecturer: maybe just don’t grow a fucking beard then, mate?
https://twitter.com/with_rhymes/status/1489726430598598665?s=20&t=QElAtebduglY1BDydKwA7g
“Triggering”. Argh.
Did we discuss this photo here, a sign at Colorado State suggesting resources for students “affected by a free speech event on campus”? An event where, maybe, someone was disagreeing with the concept of bespoke pronouns?
I ended decades of support for PP because of its transfer of resources to futile self-mutilation.
@Omar #3
I don’t. I have my own adjectives, which you must use whenever you refer to me. If you fail to do this you are a bigot who denies my existence.
(This week my adjectives are, “aubergine”, “lambent”, and “glittery”. Please make a note of them.)
The funny thing about the gender stereotypes is how many trans “women” actually are miles and miles away from the gender stereotypes. Oh, they have the high heels, the lipstick, the head tilt, the crying, but they are missing the compassion, empathy, nurturing, etc, instead exhibiting typical male pattern violence if anyone disagrees with them.
Lady M:
That’s ‘aubergine’, ‘camembert’ and ‘celery.’ Noted. (I can’t find my glasses anywhere.) Could be worked up into a wholesome meal. ;-)
BTW: You’ve heard of TERFs? Well, I’m starting a new organisation / movement / calli it what you will, under the acronym TIRMs. I’ll leave it to you to work out what the letters stand for.
Asking someone for their pronouns is triggering to people who are questioning their gender and aren’t sure what their pronouns should be, or who they can trust to use the right pronouns.
The above sentence was facetious, but I’m sure some people would agree with it.
Re #10, I am certain I’ve read that some men-who-claim-to-be-women refuse to answer such questions and insist they should simply be recognized as women, spoken of as women, it’s “obvious”.
Mai pronouns are self/evident.
It has been pointed out in the past – I can’t remember where or by whom – that compelling or pressuring people to reveal their ‘gender identity’ goes very much against the spirit of the Yogyakarta Principles (2006). Principle number six states:
Compare that to the tweet from the Human Rights Campaign cited by Colin Wright: ‘Begin a conversation with, “Hi, my pronouns are ______. What are yours?” #HowToGetOffOnTheRightFoot’. The badges pictured in that tweet are, of course, for sale from the HRC website.
[For anyone who hasn’t come across these documents before: the Yogyakarta Principles were published in two sets in 2006 and 2017. They were drawn up and signed by international panels of human rights lawyers, and set out to ‘address a broad range of international human rights standards and their application to issues of sexual orientation and gender identity‘.
They have been much criticised, especially by feminists, and for good reason: see for example Julie Bindel and Melanie Newman in the Critic last year, and a post on the website of the feminist campaign group Object!, which is based on a talk by Sheila Jeffreys.]
After finding a copy of Mr. Wright’s article which has been liberated from its paywall prison, I couldn’t agree more.
Mr. Wright provides his prescription:
I wonder about the phrasing of the response. Ought one to say “I find that question homophobic, misogynist, and inappropriate?” Or perhaps: “That question makes me very uncomfortable, because it assumes I hold a religious belief which I do not?” Or maybe, simply: “I find that question very offensive.”
I think I would say there’s no such thing as “my” pronouns, we don’t own bits of speech. Or I don’t know, maybe I would just walk away, since I would know any conversation would be a dead end.
I figured ignoring the question, as one might do with any other rude question, might be appropriate, but I’ve read that people insist instead of just dropping the topic.
“People don’t have pronouns, languages have pronouns.”
“I find the question presumptuous and inappropriate.”
“What are your participles?”
No-one has asked me yet, but if they do I plan to burst into song:-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rTEIgJsddyM
I don’t think that anyone should properly pick out their pronouns, as with their silver patterns, until their debut. My daughters also followed their mother’s and grandmother’s tradition of carefully selecting their pronouns along a theme. They consulted advisors, who analyized the pronouns of the female line going back 7 generations. When the magical night for each appeared, they revealed their silver and announced their pronouns, and then we danced.
I must admit, I cried to see them grown up. One genderqueer wtih the pronouns aer/aero, honoring their grandmother Penny the Pilot. The other NB with the pronouns Itte/bitte, in honor of their grandmother, Trudy the Petite.
My Loki, an ungrateful AMAB, ran away from home and said he wants nothing to do with us.
I hate HTML on Saturday mornings. Hate. It.
Heh. There there.
This is “first day of kindergarden” bullshit. Do they have their mittens on string?