Oh please.

Godbotherer says Trump has joined the godbotherers. Suuuuuure he has – and totally sincerely, too. It’s just a coincidence that he’s managed without god all these years until this moment when he’s running for president and oops whaddya know suddenly he starts dating Baby Jesus.

Focus on the Family founder Dr. James Dobson said Tuesday that Donald Trump recently accepted Christ.

“I believe he really made a commitment,” said the highly influential evangelical leader. “But he’s a baby Christian. We all need to be praying for him, especially if there’s a possibility of him being the next executive officer.”

“Dr” James Dobson is a highly influential patriarchal theocrat.

Asked what he thought about the meeting, Dobson described it as “historic” and an event the likes of which he had “never” seen in all his years of ministry.

“I feel like it was historic,” said Dobson. “Only God knows where we’re heading as a nation, but this gathering of God’s people sincerely, actually on their knees, a thousand people, praying together—that’s a good thing.”

Dr. Dobson agreed with Pastor Anthony that Trump seemed to conduct himself at the event in a far different manner than the public is used to seeing, and said that what was particularly important was the chance to ask him some pointed questions.

And of course there was no element of calculation at all in his change of demeanor.

“I was in a smaller group this morning at Trump Tower … and got the chance to interact with him,” said Dobson. “And he’s soft, he’s a lot nicer guy than you realize.”

Anthony agreed, saying it was something he was personally taken aback by.

“Well, I was too. And I think he is listening,” said Dobson. “There are a lot of people ministering to him personally. … He did accept a relationship with Christ. I know the person who led him to Christ. And that’s fairly recent.”

No shit, Sherlock. Any thoughts on why that might be?

Dobson underscored that Trump as a “baby Christian” simply doesn’t yet know how to speak about his faith.

“I think that he’s open,” he  continued. “He doesn’t know our language. … We had 40 Christians together with him, he used the word hell four or five times. He doesn’t know our language—he really doesn’t. He refers a lot to ‘religion’ and not much to ‘faith’ and ‘belief’ in Christ.”

Hahahaha of course he doesn’t know your language, because he’s bullshitting you, and trying to bullshit us (but apparently not trying very hard).