Ethically dubious
I sometimes notice an odd and unpleasant phenomenon: people on blogs and forums and discussion boards and the like will accuse other people of lying, and more than that, when shown to be wrong, will not withdraw the accusation, much less apologize. This is odd because in what is jestingly called real life, at least in my experience, that’s not done lightly. One doesn’t go around accusing people of lying when talking nose to nose; it doesn’t go down well. But when typing words on screen – people just step right up. Then if you tell them they’re mistaken and that they ought not to throw that accusation around so blithely, they simply vanish. Many of them do it anonymously, too, which is even more…dubious.
There was a discussion on Aaronovitchwatch last April, for instance. Jeremy commented there (to say, amusingly I thought, that Group-Schadenfreude is just a little distasteful), and Daniel Davies, whose post it was, quickly retorted by snarling, irrelevantly, at Butterflies and Wheels. Jeremy pointed out that he’s not responsible for the content of B&W. Daniel came back.
Jeremy is of course fibbing when he claims not to be responsible for the content of Butterflies & Sneers. [then he linked to the B&W About page, where it says Jeremy is Associate Editor/Webmaster] Why would anyone try to bullshit me about something a) which they know I know and b) which is so easily proved?
Jeremy was bored by then and so didn’t see the accusation, but I did, so I told Daniel he had it wrong and that I am indeed responsible for all the content of B&W. Dave Weeden pointed out that the About page doesn’t make that clear and that Daniel might have been wrong but he took his evidence from the best source available; I agreed with him –
That’s what I said. I said Daniel was wrong – I didn’t say he was “fibbing.” But he did in fact announce as a fact that Jeremy was “fibbing,” and he was wrong about that. It’s bad form to announce that people are lying when they’re not.
And that was the end of that as far as Daniel was concerned. No withdrawal, no apology, no anything.
And another (and much more protracted and insistent) example just in the last few days. Shiraz Socialist linked to an interview of me by the Freethinker and quoted one bit.
FT: Is it true that your upcoming book, Does God Hate Women?, was turned down by the first publisher because in was too critical of Islam?
OB: Yes, a publisher did turn it down for that compelling reason. It wasn’t exactly the first publisher since it never actually accepted it, but it was very interested, got Jeremy [Stangroom, the co-author] in to have a chat etc (I live six thousand miles away or I would have gone along for the chat too, whether they’d invited me or not) – then said they’d decided no because one mustn’t criticize Islam.
FT: How did you feel about that at the time?
OB: A mix of amusement and disgust, I think – amusement at the docile predictability, disgust at the crawling. I also felt even more convinced that the book was needed, precisely because a publisher would turn it down for such a reason. What publisher, you wonder? Verso.
A small cabal of anonymous people, including one who makes foolish comments here occasionally, decided to make all sorts of claims about what really happened, what Verso really said, what Verso really meant, what Verso would have said if it hadn’t been being tactful, and so on and so on. In short, they suggested that I was not telling the truth. There were a lot of sensible readers who were unimpressed by their arguments (some are regulars here, and make comments that are not foolish), but the arguments kept rolling in all the same. This went on for days; Jeremy joined in yesterday, which made sense since he’s the one who actually talked to Verso; in the end the last accuser made an awkward retreat, of the ‘all I said was’ variety. But no one bothered to withdraw the accusations, much less (as I mentioned) apologize. This is interesting.
I haven’t gone back to that AW thread, but various things occur:
1. The idea that you can prove anything by looking at an About page is laughable, especially since if Daniel Davies had bothered to do his research properly (which you’d think he would before accusing someone of lying) – using an internet archiving service, for example – he’d find it hasn’t changed in what six years?;
2. Dave Weeden’s response is moot at best. And actually this goes to the point you’re making here. The About page – though bad evidence – is only the best evidence if one starts from the assumption that I was lying. But why start from that assumption? I wasn’t lying.
3. You’ll remember that we went through the same thing with the AW crowd before. About which parts of Why Truth Matters we wrote. Exactly the same thing – the assumption was that we were lying.
Daniel Davies is a fool (though it must be said a smart fool), but you’d think that his colleagues on AW would feel slightly uneasy about this kind of thing. But apparently not.
It is interesting. I don’t think this kind of thing would happen face to face. Not least there is the threat of physical retribution in a face to face situation. (That’s not a threat – I just mean that I think people are much more inhibited about what they say if there’s the possibility of a real world response).
Having said all that – we should change the About page! :-)
Well, yes, you should change the About page, but it doesn’t strike me as being on the top of the priority list. It’s good to keep these “about” things fluid anyhow, since Murphy’s Law indicates that shortly after OB declares that she, and only she, is responsible for the content, every computer within her sphere of influence will be mysteriously toasted and JS will be called in to pick up the slack. Sounds preposterous, I know… but while I most emphatically do not believe in deities, I do believe in Murphy’s Law.
One of the reasons I usually post comments under my real first name is that it is really ME saying whatever it is I have to say. I could no more be rude to someone online than I could be to their faces. I’ve seen the reluctance of many commenters to acknowledge mistakes; I just can’t understand it. Perhaps it is because that, for me, the written word IS a real-world response.
I’ve never met you, OB, and I’m not likely to. I’ve never met any of my favorite bloggers (though I suspect one of them is someone I knew casually long ago). Yet, the bloggers I like best (you included) write with an unfeigned straightforwardness and honesty that makes them as real to me as the people I see in the flesh every day. Either y’all are damned fine actors, or you’re who you represent yourselves to be. Which is good enough for me.
People like that are the main reason I don’t participate regularly in any Internet forum. It’s impossible to have a debate with someone whose opinions are ill-informed, ill-reasoned, or both, and who thinks ad hominem attacks are a valid substitute for actually knowing something and communicating it coherently.
Sorry, Karen, it’s the less rude, less sniping, less baiting DFG that is the fake….
DFG, I don’t know you; you’re not on my favorite bloggers list (though such things can always change!) so I’m not fussed.
I do want to make a statement in favor of civil straightforwardness, though. I’m a naturally lazy person. Lying, blustering, obfuscation, sniping, and other BS just requires too damn much effort. Cut the crap and let’s just deal with the ideas.
I’m an advocate for laziness. Being honest and straightforward is *easy*. Why should I indulge my ego when both it and I could be off doing something more fun?
Then perhaps you should make deeper observations than being shocked at children wearing the hijab under their bicycle helmets.
Also Karen this was a real gem from a recent thread? This, too, is what my country has wrought. If there were any real justice in the U.S., the politicians who started the current Iraq war would be tried for war crimes against the people of Iraq and Afghanistan, for creating such a terrible situation in Iraq and neglecting the security of Afghanistan. I can’t imagine leaving the U.S. right now. I couldn’t hold my head up in public for embarrassment
Now that is lazy.
Sigh.
But I guess that type of post works as a magnet for this type of comment. I’m not in doubt that OB is right but I do fear being right about personal things does not mix well with having opinions that matter.
Y’see, this is why I periodically give up on the Interwebs, as bad for my blood-pressure, and destructive of human sympathy. The level of discussion really does encourage the view that apocalypse would be a good idea.
Richard wrote: “the politicians who started the current Iraq war would be tried for war crimes against the people of Iraq and Afghanistan”
Iraq I can understand but Afghanistan ia outrageous. After 9/11 the UN sanctioned the removal of the Taliban regime at which point the UN invaded Afghanistan and removed the Taliban regime. That’s “UN”, not “US”. All the arguments about Iraq started with the US not getting an explicit UN mandate for invading. This does not apply in the case of Afghanistan. The removal of the Taliban regime was the correct thing to do and it was done in the correct manner.
Paul I didnt write that I was quoting a previous comment from another thread, as always I made a mess of the spacing and did not use quotation marks so it looked like I wrote it. I fully support both the war in Iraq and Afghanistan for the record.
I find the lying accusation astonishing as well. I’m quite prepared to hear that my arguments are stupid and my examples are off the point but that I fabricated something. . . I am totally taken aback by that.
“don’t think this kind of thing would happen face to face. Not least there is the threat of physical retribution in a face to face situation.”
In Victorian times it was allowable for one gentleman to punch another who “gave him the lie”, or to kick him downstairs. Among intimates eg spouses or partners, for one to habitually call the other a liar indicates a pretty serious breakdown of a relationship.
Anyway, it’s out of order in a debate.
Richard:
I have to apologize to you and everyone else as my post had a serious error that vitiated my point.
I thought the UN had given explicit specific authorisation to the invasion before it started. Instead its resolution 1368 was more general that that: it did not mention Afghanistan.
As I said I apologize for this to everyone and to Richard in particular.
I do indeed remember that we went through the same thing with the AW crowd before. “Exactly the same thing – the assumption was that we were lying.” Just so. This is, frankly, a habit of Daniel Davies’s, and not a very respectable one.
Thanks, Karen!
By the way, JoB –
“I’m not in doubt that OB is right but I do fear being right about personal things does not mix well with having opinions that matter.”
Yeah but it’s not just personal. It’s epistemological, for one thing, and ethicological for another – and the two interact in interesting ways. If one gets invested in attacking or protecting Person X or Sacred Book Y, that investment will tend to pull one’s reasoning faculties out of alignment. Assuming that people you dislike are lying will tend to cause you to get things wrong. That’s not personal.
OB, no quarrels there. Just afraid you are too invested in protecting you. No shred of inclination here to doubt the integrity of anyone. I am just more in favour of attacking religious daftness (not quite in blogger’s wars: no doubt the terms lying, foolish, nonsense and gibberish are overused on blogs & fora but, so what?, we all know – one lives with it like with mosquito’s in summer and moves on (don’t get me wrong: I do understand you want to set this record straight, I only think this is not the most elegant nor efficient way for it, and, after all what can one do against a counterfactual claim ‘if they hadn’t been tactful about it’? It is counter-factual after all (& wasn’t it in the end published? So who cares if they’d been tactful if they’re proven wrong? (unless these Verso people do this on a recidivist basis in which case: let us really get on their case! we don’t need to be so bashful – blast ’em for being a disgrace to publishing!))))
1)Not least there is the threat of physical retribution in a face to face situation
2)In Victorian times it was allowable for one gentleman to punch another who “gave him the lie”, or to kick him downstairs.
Is it really the threat of physical abuse that keeps face-to-face situations (supposedly) more inhibited?
I would posit that it is also the threat of immediate humiliation or defeat, the fact that you cannot as easily disengage, and the fact that you probably know the person…
It is also much easier to be articulate and to pick at/pick over arguements and points. Half of the heated, drawn out debates on the interweb would be over and done in 5 min in the real world.
I am just posting to apologise for going a whole day without being so wrong that I should apologise.
Once again, my apologies.
DFG:” would posit that it is also the threat of immediate humiliation or defeat, the fact that you cannot as easily disengage, and the fact that you probably know the person…”
Have you taken a dog for a walk? See, if your dog is big, it never has to fight much smaller dogs. If your dog is little, it doesn’t have to fight much bigger dogs.
In the physical world we have a host of signals of relative status, of whether we are in competition or not. We are built to adjust our behaviour to those signals, a behaviour pattern that includes such phenomena as ‘good and bad manners’. Withdrawing the face-to-face means that the signals are limited to the warm glow of self-approval. Judging by what I read on teh interwebs, this is more easily created by flaming an ‘idiot’ than by acknowledging one’s own fault.
Oh! Darn, that looks like evolutionary psychology making arogant claims again. I apologise for my deeply flawed reading of human nature.
Ophelia, OK, point taken, it just had a more personal feeling to it than that – you’re right, one of the reasons I come here is it is not one of those blogs, I just wonder whether it’s sustainable to avoid degeneration of language, AND the degeneration into a form of correctness (dunno, so yes: it is interesting – but why is it? Take CP here for instance, I have the distinct impression he feels a bit insecure about something, I’d guess that is not because he feels not quite, or not enough physically threatened but it is because he does not get enough of real attention)
I’m not very gung ho on psychologizing, but I know the latter worked & works it for me. You feel you have to say things but you do not have anybody ‘around’ so the internet is your great solution, &, alas, it’s such a quiet place so you’re out on a limb to be noticed. Temptation is big: you start shouting, insulting & in some cases self-mutilating. Just all too human – not because lack of threat, no, lack of love – let’s be positive on the negative, at least when it’s true.
So, there you have it, a theory for the interesting thing: people just wanna be luv’d!
Job, if you are referring to me, my insecurity is whether I am sharp enough to fit in the circle of B&W people. I presume that they are not only pretty smart but in their fields a LOT better educated. And living in an intellectually indefensible faith doesn’t help generate a feeling of security at this present location ;-) .
CP, no, not referring to you, just to a concept I have of you. Anyway, why this insecurity?, why put in terms that seem deliberately cast to make us doubt your sincerity about your insecurity?, is it the warm glow of self-approval? – if it is, it would be just flaming idiocy, so please convince me otherwise. I’m quite prepared to be sorry for you but you’ll have to give me a good reason first ;-)
ChrisPer,
Dog behaviour is a little more complex than that. As is Human behaviour.
Are you really suggesting that physical presence trumps all real-world arguements, that there are no other factors?
I get (I think) what you are saying but self-approval? eh??
DFG
“I would posit that it is also the threat of immediate humiliation or defeat, the fact that you cannot as easily disengage, and the fact that you probably know the person…”
Sure – I said “Not least” about the physical retribution thing.
I suppose I’m really thinking about the fact that people are willing to be far more abusive – including unjustified accusations of lying – on the internet that they’d ever be in real life. Part of it is surely that there is no physical risk.
Of course there’s also other stuff as well (as you point out).
I had a similar incident the other day here in Toronto – which I can’t talk about in any detail because it’ll just come across that I’m trying to appear macho, etc – but the gist of it was that some person abused me for no reason whilst they were in a car (they were waiting to pull into a parking lot, and I was outrageously in their way on the sidewalk!), and then when I went to meet them in the parking lot to point out that they’d been impolite, they refused point blank to get out of the car.
The point is I’m damn sure they wouldn’t have abused me had they not been in the car in the first place. Not because I’m tough – just because the car made them feel cocooned, you know, kind of divorced from the realities of the outside world.
Another thing is that if you wander into a blog and find people there going for each other hammer and tongs there is some back history that you don’t know – there are old blog enemies there. Or, you don’t want to take issue with someone whom you know is usually sensible, honest and to the point, but in this instance is being unreasonable and aggressive. You find some being dealt with savagely then you find on making their blog acquaintance that they deserve it.
I do dislike psychologising – I assume everyone else has the same motives as I have for joining in with a blog – I’m interested in the topic and have something to say about it.
While the point about insulation is true I believe another more powerful element is that for some people accusations of dishonesty are just rhetorical devices. If it is just something you say to win an argument rather than an actual assertion about the world then you are going to be puzzled when people are upset by it, and even imagine that their upset is some sort of pose.
Lack of physical risk an issue ? Sure, but risk to reputation might come into play in the long run. As the years pass, some people who want an enduring presence might have to change their style of engagement into one with more rigour and commitment to debate, if they don’t want to be marginalised as timewasters. This might then start to distinguish those who just want to let off steam and those using the medium for something more substantial.
KBP, come on, what’s wrong with saying one wants a little attention? It’s far more positive psychologizing than this talk of people mouthing off because it is risk-free. Is wanting attention not commensurate with being interested? Is it me or are all of you going macho on me here?
I’ve never been in a self-help group – never will if I have a say in it – but let me take this occasion to say: “Let me come out & admit it: I like it when people pay attention to my view on the internet.” That wasn’t hard, do try it yourself!
(& don’t thank me for paying attention to you, I just loooved doing it)
JoB…if you see “I assume everyone else has the same motives as I have for joining in with a blog – I’m interested in the topic and have something to say about it” as KB “going macho” on you, then yes, it’s you.
LOL!
Daniel Davies always looks for some way to impute/infer the worst possible motivation for people. For example, his view on the 2006 debate about the Racila nd Religious Hatred Act:
“I’m sure nobody involved intended it this way[5], but to an outsider it would certainly look as if the 2006 kerfuffle had very little to do with freedom of speech, except in as much as it could be picked up as a handy stick to beat the Muslims with.”
http://crookedtimber.org/2008/05/09/what-about-violent-necrophiliac-gay-bestiality/
Of course, he is sure that nobody intended it this way, but just thought it say it all the same. So that’s alright then!
JoB I wasn’t thinking about your comment when I said I hated psychologising. I rather like the thought of being macho – I’ve just poured myself a beer, kicked three doors and thrown my computer across the room. It’s made rather a mess. . .
No, I was thinking about some commenters who are rounded on as having some kind of search for a father figure or what have you because they disagree with the main body of the site and most of the commenters.
As for attention on a blog, it goes without saying that anyone who comments on a blog wants to be read and acknowledged as anyone who joins in a conversation wants to be heard and replied to.
Could be, KB. Or it could be the sheer joy of taking the piss. That happens in conversation, too.
Ah but Jerry were your actions determined by the place where you were? for example would you feel more comfortable confronting someone on a university campus than you would at an extreme fighting convention?
That said good on you for not taking crap!
Just to expand it a bit more what if the person you wish to confront is another race would that alter the dynamic even further?
KBP, I kicked four, made more of a mess but, hey, do you think I care? the wife will be in soon enough.
Shouting: this is a joke!
Seriously, I’m with you. But that is in the end attention too. Only they aren’t getting it enough so they compensate, & annoy because, ultimately annoying gets them noticed.
DFG, of course taking the piss can be a joyful moment but only if it gets you a right kind of attention, laughing or so
It’s never safe to assume an old woman is harmless. Some of us are damn dangerous!
“Some of us are damn dangerous!”
Don’t I know it! :-)
Anyway the
harmless old woman…person in the parking lot started waving their cell phone at me and squawking something about the police, so I had to beat a hasty, undignified retreat as it was!You do indeed, and a good thing too!
But seriously – she had some gall doing that, unless you were being actually threatening, which I simply take for granted you weren’t. It’s like that convention one sees in old movies, whereby women can slap men in the face whenever they feel like it, secure in the expectation that the men won’t slap back. Well, that’s cowardly and bullying. She mouths off at you for no reason and then threatens to call the police when you reply. That’s chickenshit in two ways – she was using her gender and her car. I’m a woman so I get to abuse you, and I’m in a car so I get to abuse you; you’re a man and you’re on foot, so you have to just take it.
That’s crap.
Ah – it wasn’t actually a woman: that was a joke (mind you, I do tend to tell the story as if I were terrorising an old woman)!
But yes it did play out like that. I wasn’t actually being threatening – not least the guy didn’t get out of the car – but certainly I might have seemed threatening. (I did follow the fella into the recesses of a parking lot. And it was dark.)
I got annoyed (briefly). He was doing this macho roaring of the engine thing by the edge of the sidewalk, and then when I didn’t speed out of his way, he gave me a volley of abuse. It was an instance of this typical low-level anti-social bullying thing that males (mainly) seem to indulge in.
Needless to say, had he got out of the car, and looked threatening himself, I would have run away!
Ah, caught again!
Gee, I can’t imagine why you’d be annoyed by that.
“squawking”, Jerry?
Is this in the same category as “shrill”?
This whole thread is getting a bit strange. The ultimate sanction in a verbal arguement (originating in a ‘discussion’) might be violence, but really… Generally, you know that it might be heading there. Whether you continue to goad is up to you. (or the amoutn you have drunk…)
Jerry that rage thing happens to all guys as they aproach their 50s someone once told me that men loose most of their testosterone between the age of 40 to 50 and it tends to get replaced by anger, it made sence to me because since I turned 50 I am ticked all the time.
Anger and Impotence?
Sorry, a little below the belt.
Interesting question. Squawking would be in the same category as ‘shrill’ in certain circumstances. I think I once objected to your use of that word, and that’s what prompted your question? But the circumstances do make a difference. I know Jerry better than I know you, so I happen to know that ‘squawking’ is part of his idiolect and that he uses it of men and women alike; he uses it of himself. Degree of interpersonal knowledge makes a huge difference to what kind of language it’s safe (in the sense of not creating more hostility than is intended) to use. Of course, you intended to create quite a lot of hostility, as you’ve said yourself; so the question about the two words is rather disingenuous, isn’t it.
Not at all. Rhetorical not disingenuous.
This is a publice forum, so your familiarity with the Jerry’s use of hte term is somewhat irrelevant.
And regardless, I still reject your claim that there was a misogynistic element to my use (if I even did??) of ‘shrill’.
True, about the public forum. I suppose I just meant I don’t pick up on it, because of the background knowledge.
Well if you didn’t use ‘shrill’ then I didn’t say there was a misogynist element to your use of it!
Touche