Sign-up now, OB!
I’ve just received a bit of Spam email that really should have been sent to OB, so I’m reproducing it here.
—————————
Become a legally ordained minister within 48 hours
As a minister, you will be authorized to perform the rites and ceremonies of the church!
Perform Weddings, Funerals, Perform Baptisms, Forgiveness of Sins
Visit Correctional Facilities
Want to start your own church?
Click here to sign-up!
—————————
I wonder what’s involved in performing forgiveness of sins?
I think they should have a ceremony for refusing to forgive sins! The Permanent Implacability Ceremony or some such. That I could do.
“I wonder what’s involved in performing forgiveness of sins?”
Generous tithing, nothing less….
“I think they should have a ceremony for refusing to forgive sins!”
Yes. And maybe they could award bonus points if you hold a baby’s head under water for longer than is strictly necessary during a baptism.
Oh, that’s a thought. And of course there are rich possibilities in the confessional. Greeting everyone’s mumbles with “You did what?! That’s disgusting!! I’ve never heard of anything like that in my life, you’re sick, you’re depraved, get the hell out of here and never come back!”